comic con interviews

Our very own Sandy had the pleasure of interviewing some of the guys from Veronica Mars at Comic Con this year. Unfortunately we weren't able to record the interviews to publish on the podcast but here we have the transcript.

I was very, very fortunate (thanks to the awesome folks at Warner Bros.) to get the opportunity to speak with some of the cast of Veronica Mars while at Comic Con. Originally I was scheduled to interview Ryan Hansen, Jason Dohring, Michael Muhney, and Francis Capra individually and I prepared a catalogue of groundbreaking and insightful questions. However, as these things often do, everything fell a bit behind and Francis got stuck in traffic so in the spirit of communal enlightenment, I had the pleasure of conducting my interviews with the TV Whore. You can find her site (and, soon, pictures! because Sandy lost her camera) at siklilgrl.livejournal.com/. What follows is a transcript of that account. My utmost thanks to Warner Bros. for setting it up and to Ryan, Jason, and Michael for making it the most memorable interview I've ever done!

Michael Muhney is the first to be brought over to us. We are introduced and he says he's happy to meet me in person (whee!)

MM: So I can't talk about my habitual drug use now, right?

NPR: Right.

MM: [looking at Enrico Colantoni who, about 6 feet away is holding a mic and conducing an on air interview] I love this guy look at him he's holding his own mic. I sort of picture Keith is no longer a private detective, he's now a news anchor! A correspondent.

[much laugher from TVW and me]

MM: And look at him, he's like "The weather here along the beach in Neptune is cold with a slight. chance. of rain. Veronica's at home watching tv and she's see her dad and she's like, we gotta get Sheriff out of office. We gotta get dad back. We're losing it. I'm sorry."

[More laughter. This will be a running theme]

MM: Go ahead. Ask the serious questions.

NPR: Now I'm all distracted thinking about what he could be reporting on.

MM: Well while you are asking just know that this is where I'm looking at, this is what I'm thinking in my head, I'm imagining an alter conversation going on or broadcast rather.

NPR: ok! Well, congratulations on being a series regular!

TVW: Yes! Congratulations.

[claps all around]

MM: Thank you, I'm so excited.

NPR: So well deserved.

MM: Thank you, thank you. I would say so but I'm completely unobjective.

NPR: Do you think, I know there was sort of a lot of fan press for that. Fans were like, why isn't Sheriff Lamb a regular? He's in 16 episodes in season 2! Did that have any effect do you think?

MM: Well honestly, I'm the person to my dying day that's always gonna say the things that are happening with the show and the things that are happening with me on this show are because of the fans. Thats the level one belief. Then the next level that's not so powerful or carrying as much weight would be sort of the pragmatic side of Rob that was saying that "You know, I've got you in five of the first six episodes or blah blah blah. I'm realizing I wanna use you more, we've got to sort of hold you aside, we've got to own you because if we lose you, we lose a big story telling side of Veronica Mars the show." And so, that was sort of in the works all at the same time that the audience is becoming more hyper-aware and sensitive to Lamb's appearances and so I think it sort of happened together in sort of a symbiotic way but certainly the fans have had so much to do with this show and so much to do with me, um, individually and so that's why I've tried to reach out and have so much to do with them because I know the definition of gratitude. I'm not a thankless person.

TVW: Can you define it?

[laughs]

MM: [leans in] I can show you.

[pause, followed by fangirl giggles]

NPR: Well, that'd be alright!

MM: Time to make out! [Sandy's heart stops beating] Pause the recorder for five minutes of make out.

[pause]

NPR: And we're back!

[more fangirly giggles]

NPR: Wow. Ok.

TVW: Come on, Sandy.

NPR: [with renewed composure] Do you ever find that...

MM: [back to Enrico voice] Should be cloudy on Wednesday. Perhaps a slight chance of s....[Enrico's interview ends] oh look! He just quit. He's like, I'm done. I can't do this correspondent work.

[more. laughing.]

NPR: Do you ever feel that your work is affected by the fan reaction? Like, do you read something that people-

MM: [to Enrico] That looked good! You looked like you could be a correspondent.

EC: [too softly for my dictaphone to pick up, essentially commenting about how it's his dream]

MM: [calling after Enrico, who has walked away] Slight chance of rain!

MM: [back to us] Go ahead, I'm sorry. What?

NPR: No! It's ok. I was just asking do you ever think that fans affect how you perform when you play your role?

MM: Um. No. I ultimately decide what I want to do or a director may have a veto on that and certainly Rob has the most to do with what I do, but I think what I perform is completely up to me, however I will say that certain things that I've noticed or read or found out that fans react to I, I sort of can curtail my character in that direction. I can sort of mold. If it doesn't affect what I want to get done in a scene, it doesn't affect anything or doesn't jeopardize any part of the plot or my character or anything I certainly enjoy doing what people enjoy seeing because ultimately we're doing this, these performances are for the audience. This is for the people. I mean, it's back to the old Shakespearean performing at the Globe days, you are performing for the gallery that's out there. The audience, the peanut gallery, whoever they are, they're there. You're doing it for them. So you can't, like, you're what, doing it for yourself? If you wanna act for yourself in front of the mirror, stay at home. If you wanna act for an audience do what they want without jeopardizing what you need to do in the show.

NPR: Right.

TVW: And as a follow on to that, with the access to fans, because you make yourself so accessible, it's hard to ask you questions because you've answered everything.

[laughs all around]

TVW: So, is there anything you wish people would ask you about the show or about your performance?

MM: Um, [laughs] no. You pretty much have it covered, I'd say

TVW: We've asked you everything!

MM: Yeah! They come up with creative ways to ask me things that I had no idea could've even been asked but yeah, you know um, they're...fans are inquisitive so, therefore, I like to be informative without jeopardizing my job and getting fired for revealing mysteries of the show. That's the one thing about this show. If it weren't a mystery, if it weren't a Lost or even a Battlestar Gallactica-ish or the Veronica Mars show that it is, if it were just The Office or something besides revealing if they're finally gonna get together and make out at the end of the season, and uh, and are they, right but everything else you can talk about but here unfortunately there is so much I have to keep secret and, and it's awful, it's like here my mouth is, about two feet away from your microphone and just behind my teeth I could form the words that would tell you guys things that would blow your mind because it's things that I know; however, I'm bursting at the seems because I can't, you know! But that's the fun part too, is to then - the medium by which you're supposed to see the mysteries revealed is by watching the show, not by hearing the leaks and the spoilers and stuff. I'm really sort of anti-spoiler. I won't even watch previews to a movie I know I'm gonna go see, because I figure if I'm gonna go see the movie then I don't wanna...you know, my mom was trying to send me this minute and a half trailer for Battlestar Gallactica Season 3 and she said "I sent it to you, I burned it onto a DVD it's on its way to your house" and I said "Well I'm gonna throw it away, I don't wanna watch it!" I, I'm sold! I'm already

TVW: No! Keep it. You could watch it after.

MM: Sure, fine, but - like a highlight reel or something, in the middle of the night when I wake up and need some more BSG. No, but it's like - I don't wanna see, I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna hear anything because I'm sold, you already got me, I'm an audience member, I'm gonna watch it. I'm there, so, you know, but I've proven my point a little excessively recently about spoilers because I'm trying to get people out there to realize: you'll enjoy the ride more if you aren't spoiled.

NPR: Oh, totally. We're both total spoilerphobes so you're preaching to the choir here.

[laughs]

TVW: No spoilers!

MM: I mean, that's why they call them spoilers! They don't, they don't call 'em well dones! They call them spoiled. They mean it's rotten, it's nasty, it doesn't taste as good going down.

NPR: Yeah, understandable.

[At this time, Ryan Hansen comes over to join us. I have to say, Ryan Hansen is 9 kinds of dreamy. Damn. All of these guys are, but this is the first time I've seen Ryan in person so I was all swoon-y. Forgive me, Pirates.]

MM: Bring him in! This sexy mother. [Ryan laughs] I jumped into one of his interviews earlier, it's only fair. So did you tell them, you told them about the strip search that Lamb's gonna do to Dick?

RH: Yeah, it's a whole homoerotic...

TVW: Hey! No spoilers!

[laughs all around]

NPR: No, I think we can make an exception here. Please continue.

[laughs]

RH: Yeah, so uh, new at the station they're using whips and stuff this time, and like S&M masks and stuff

NPR: Hot.

[Ryan laughs]

MM: Yeah, he's like "taser my nether-regions"

[big laughs]

TVW: PG! PG!

RH: Horrible. Horrible.

MM: I said nether-regions!

NPR: Wow, this show's gonna get really good next season!

MM: Can you imagine?

RH: No, I couldn't. *small voice* yes, I can.

MM: You'd have to pay me a lot more.

[giggles]

MM: Lamb! We need you running around in a thong, chasing after Dick. Meanwhile, Logan's behind bars -

[laughs]

MM: recovering from the night before.

NPR: Wow, sounds like fanfic. It's gonna be written, as soon as these go live.

RH: [While laughing] This is horrible, this is horrible.

MM: Great, great.

NPR: You brought it on yourselves, that's all.

TVW: You suggested the idea.

RH: Michael was smoking outside, it's cool.

MM: Yep. I was.

RH: Just kidding.

MM: I call it "taking a breather."

[big laughs]

RH: A little "fresh air"

MM: [giggling] yeah.

RH: So what's up? Comic con, right?

NPR: Yes!

RH: I've never been.

TVW: How could you have never been, you live here?

RH: I know! Well, I'm from here.

TVW: You don't live here anymore?

MM: He has beach front property in Malibu, but he's from San Diego.

RH: I don't, I live in North Hollywood. It's beautiful. Have you been there?

NPR & TVW: No-

[at this point the recording becomes a bunch of squealing nonsense because Jason Dohring has taken a running leap onto the back of Ryan Hansen's chair and is now sharing the chair with him, one in back of the other. Pretty much spooning. No, I'm not making this up.]

RH: [exclaiming] How did you do that?!

MM: That was amazing. It could've been a lot worse.

RH: You managed to push me perfectly...

MM: No wait look...

TVW&NPR: [in shock because now Michael reaches between Ryan's legs. Keep in mind that Ryan is still being straddled on the chair by Jason. No, I'm still not making this up.] Whoa! Ok, uh...

MM: [pulling out a cellphone from Ryan's....nether-regions] look! You had a baby!

RH: Push honey! Push! [inexplicably since, right now, I'm pretty sure he's the girl in all this]

MM: Congratulations, boys! You've given birth to a new phone!

RH: [to Jason, who is now climbing up] How did you do that?

MM: That was really phenomenal. [You can tell, here, that Michael is feeling a mixture of jealously and awe at Jason's chair jumping prowess. Keep that in mind for later.]

NPR: I don't know, but I feel really special right now.

[At this point, Jason gets whisked away. I know! The big tease. TVW takes Michael off to one side, and I get Ryan all to myself. Please allow me a moment of fangirly squeals]

RH: Sooooo.

NPR: So.

RH: My phone broke. I think I sat on it.

NPR: Oh! You sat on your phone? I'm sorry.

RH: I have to turn it back on to see if it will - it's ok, sorry. Go ahead.

[Jason still lingers, even though they are attempting to steal him from us. He finally relents, and promises to come back.]

RH: Whatever, J!

[At this point I take some time to introduce myself to Ryan and explain about our little podcast here.]

NPR: So, we actually just had Kyle Gallner on and talked to him, he is-

RH: How long ago was that?

NPR: Just a couple weeks ago. [Or, you know, last month. I lost all sense of time in that room. I blame the hotness...I mean, heat. It was record highs in San Diego.]

RH: Really? Where was that?

NPR: Oh, we dialed him in. He called in.

RH: Ok, cool.

NPR: Yeah, so he was in LA and called in to us and he is the sweetest guy.

RH: Isn't he amazing?

NPR: He is terrific.

RH: Ok, honestly, he's really like my brother. I mean especially when we were working so much together. I love the guy so much. He's like my little brother! We really have the best time together, we had so much chemistry and had so much in common that we both just- We were just like, honestly we were just like little kids together. It was so fun.

NPR: You could see that a lot on the screen, I think.

RH: Yeah.

NPR: You know Dick would sort of treat Cassidy pretty poorly verbally

RH: Right

NPR: But one of the points that Kyle made, which I thought was a really great point, was that he still took him everywhere.

RH: Right.

NPR: He still hung out with him all the time.

RH: Exactly.

NPR: He had to like him.

RH: Definitely.

NPR: So, on that note, what is going to happen with Dick now that he knows all of this information about his little brother?

RH: Right. Well, like you said, I think he really did actually care for his brother. He definitely does deal with it in the first couple of episodes. I think, I think he cared for him more than he thought. And, yeah, he deals with it, he does a lot of drinking and um, he doesn't deal with it in a good way.

NPR: Yeah. Well it just seems like Dick has always been sort of the plucky comic relief.

RH: Right right.

NPR: He just sort of comes in and brings the lightness to an otherwise really dark show. Well, your back story just got a whole lot darker!

RH: I know!

NPR: So are you still gonna be, you know, Captain Comic Relief or?

RH: Right, I think, I think the writers - I think I will totally still be comic relief. I think the writers like to write for me, for the character way too much.

NPR: [laughs] Yeah.

RH: I mean, they are so good at it. I think there will be a sense of, you know, the background darkness but he definitely is still Dick.

NPR: Yeah.

RH: So, he'll always have that. I mean, I think he'll always have his comments and stuff.

NPR: Well, I can't wait to see what sort of direction that it takes.

RH: Yeah! Me too. It's gonna be cool.

[At this point, Michael was whisked away so TVWhore comes over to join Ryan and me.]

NPR: We're talking about how Dick is sort of gonna change now that he finds out that he and Logan have something in common in that they're both from, you know, Casa de Killers and.

RH: Yeah, oh! Good one! She's good!

[Laughs]

RH: Second episode, first episode.

NPR: [because I can't stop showing what a dork I am] Second episode.

RH: Second episode. When does that come out? August, right?

NPR: Yeah, August 22nd, right?

RH: I'm so excited.

NPR: Are you gonna be on one of the DVD pictures?

RH: I hope so!

NPR: They better!

RH: I saw like online, my dad showed me, um, I'm on the back cover but I'm that big [indicating, with his fingers, approximately 2 centimeters.]

[laughs]

NPR: You're only that big on the back cover! [My shock is totally feigned, you all know I've got the DVD box art saved to my hard drive.]

RH: But I'm on there! Fricken' A! I'm on there.

[At this point Jason Dohring returns to us, as promised. I apologize for the stupidity with which I conduct myself in the rest of the interview. I seriously ask some ridiculously dumb questions. The stupidity infliction began approximately the same time Jason Dohring came over and sat down. Make of that what you will.]

JD: Logan!

[laughs]

RH: I'll do it! I'll do it!

NPR: Let's hear!

RH: [flipping his head up, as if looking up at someone from the ground] Logan!

[big, big laughs all around]

RH: It's the hair too.

JD: Yeah.

RH: And like, the nostrils.

JD: No, you were like, beefed up in that scene. I keep telling you that, man.

RH: I was, huh!

JD: You were like, pumped, dude and you were getting me pumped.

[Ryan laughs]

JD: I'm serious, man! You remember that?

RH: Yeah, yeah yeah. Totally.

JD: You really had it going, dude.

RH: Jason and I have a blast working together. I honestly, when I find out I have a scene with Jason, I get really excited because he always wants the other person to do as good as the scene is and it's so fun to be able to work with him, because he always wants to work on it, and like sharpen it, and "Do you wanna run it? Let's run it! Do you feel good?" He's always taking care, it's awesome to work with him. There's a lot of scenes-

JD: But Ryan is so fucking good. This is a total ego-stroke interview-

[laughs]

JD: But, um,

RH: Oh, stop

JD: No! He is, dude. He's so free, dude. Like, I've rarely met an actor that's so free and just, if you just let him go, dude, he'll just screw the maid till the morning's end, right?

[laughs]

RH: Yeah.

JD: In the first episode he's in a speedo and he's just, he has a scene

NPR: Wait. What?!

JD: He has a scene with a french maid.

RH: Whoopsie! Teaser! Teaser! I'm a little bummed about that.

NPR: Wow! Between that and the, Lamb/Logan/Dick scene we were talking about earlier-

[Ryan laughs. Jason looks confused...and a little scared.]

TVW: Wait, what?

NPR: Jason hasn't gotten that copy of the script yet.

[Ryan laughs]

NPR: It's gonna be great, just wait.

JD: Wait, there's...

RH: [stage whisper] Michael's crazy.

JD: Really?

RH: No, I'm just kidding.

NPR: He just wrote a little fan fic while he was sitting here. [This is the first point that I get myself down a path I didn't want to go on. Sigh]

JD: Wait. What is a fan fic? I don't know what that is. I've heard of that.

[See?]

RH: I don't know what it is either.

NPR: [dying a little inside] Um.

TVW: [rising to the occasion] Fan fiction.

JD: Oooh.

TVW: Like, people writing parts of the show.

JD: Oh, I see.

RH: What, so like-

NPR: You - don't want to know.

[TVW laughs, because she knows I'm right]

NPR: Don't go like, read it.

TVW: Yeah, that'd be-

RH: So, do they write what they think is gonna happen, or just like their own-

TVW: Some of them write what they think is going to happen, some write what they want to happen.

JD: So, like a fantasy thing?

RH: Is it dirty!

TVW&NPR: Yeeeeah.

RH: Ohhhhh!

NPR: Not all of it!

TVW: The two of you get pretty close in some of it.

RH: Oh, that's nice.

TVW: That's one way to put it.

NPR: It's...not a universe you guys want to explore.

RH: Ok.

NPR: Um, wow, that went down like, a tangent I did not-

TVW: Ok, I want to ask my question really quick. No spoiling me. Three words to describe season 3 so far.

JD: oh, um.

RH: Hot, hot, and hot.

JD: ooh.

RH: Just kidding, just kidding.

TVW: That's four. Hot, hot, and hot.

RH: ooh. Hot, hot, and.

TVW: or just hot, hot, hot.

JD: I would say, um, let's see. College, uh. Uh doesn't count. Speedos.

[giggles]

RH: Stop it!

JD: Hot.

[Big laughs]

TVW: Thank you.

JD: Yeah.

RH: I'm not good at that. Why three?

TVW: It's season 3, so, three things.

RH: Ahh.

JD: I can't wait for next year. Yours will work next year1

[laughs]

RH: Hot, hot, AND hot!.

JD: Better remember that shit.

NPR: Alright, well I have a question about the characters you guys play and their relationship with each other.

RH: Yeah, totally.

NPR: We sort of started to get into that, you know, how Dick is going to certainly be darker and the thing is, Logan is going to have all this information now about Dick sort of inadverntantly contributing to Veronica's rape in a way

RH: Right.

NPR: So they have this common bond in that they both have homicidal maniacs in the family but then they also have this thing which I can't imagine Logan's just gonna let go, is that going to affect the relationship between the two characters?

JD: You know, I think - I don't know, man. That would be an interesting storyline. I think back when he did that, I didn't really, I dunno, I wasn't too into Veronica, you know what I mean, like too much or whatever so I didn't - and he didn't even know, right?

NPR: Well, he put Cassidy in the room with her.

JD: Right.

TVW: All speculation, though.

JD: Yeah, yeah yeah.

NPR: Alright, fair enough, fair enough.

JD: But they-

TVW: It's from everybody's point of view.

JD: Yeah, [to Ryan] you didn't know you gave her the GHB, right?

TVW: Although, he did admit that he put her in there, so nevermind.

JD: Cause that went to Madison.

RH: Right.

NPR: Right, right, right.

JD: It was Beaver that did it, I mean. I dunno.

RH: Right.

JD: Would you know that he would do it anyways?

TVW: Well, the point is he took Veronica in the bedroom.

RH: But I don't think he thought he would actually do it.

JD: At that point she wasn't my girlfriend.

RH: Right, well we both have such screwed up pasts that I think we are going to have that bond forever.

JD: Totally. I'm looking forward to seeing kind of like, how it could go. That'd be fucking rad to make that dark and I think my guy might go lighter.

RH: Right.

[At this point, Jason gets his lunch put together by his absolutely adorable wife, Lauren.]

RH: Whoa! I wish my wife were here.

JD: Yes! You wanna little bite?

RH: No, no. I'm good. Thank you, thank you so much.

JD: But I think like, with his father being gone or whatever, it's going to be kind of like that suppression is off of him and I think he'll be happier. It'll be dope to see this guy [indicating Ryan] do it, because he's got some shit, he's got some acting chops. I'm looking forward to seeing it.

NPR: I can't wait to see it. So are you guys gonna both be in college?

RH: College bound!

TVW: No no no, I have a question about that. How the hell Dick got into Hearst anyway?

RH: Right, so.

TVW: How much money did you donate? A building?

RH: No, that was. I think actually they were going to do that, but my mom, my real mom, I gather, this isn't like, shot or anything, but someone says it. My real mom married someone very high up so, heh, Dick is getting in.

TVW: I thought she was married.

RH: Yeah, I dunno.

[laughs]

JD: But his dad is out, her husband was exiled.

RH: Right.

TVW: huh?

JD: His dad is-

TVW: Yeah, but

RH: You guys thought she was remarried?

TVW: Yeah, isn't your real mom the mom who came

RH: Right, that's her.

TVW: Wasn't she married to somebody and they went to Europe?

JD: She was married-

TVW: Kendall would be the one who was married to Dick Sr. when he was exiled.

RH: Right but...you guys are good.

TVW: Nevermind!

RH: No!

[laughs]

RH: I dunno! I dunno if she was married, but she's re-married.

TVW: I'll just bitch about it when it shows.

[laughs]

RH: No, but I think that's what happens.

JD: I'm trying to think, did she have a husband?

RH: I don't know if she was married.

JD: I don't know.

TVW: Well was she going to Europe by herself? She didn't want any of the kids to come.

NPR: I'm pretty sure she said she was married but that's-

RH: I dunno...

NPR: That's alright.

RH: She, ok, she got divorced and remarried.

NPR: This show does a pretty good job with continuity so I can't complain if they have this one thing...

RH: No, I think she got divorced, okaaaay,

NPR: In Europe, and then re-married, gotcha. So, I didn't know Logan was applying to college. Is he going?

JD: yeah, he got in.

TVW: Yeah, they're all going.

NPR: Right, I know, but I didn't know he was applying

TVW: That's the one thing I read from TCAs

JD: I think he's going because he was with Veronica, you know what I mean, at the end of the season. She's going, so he's just.

NPR: So he's just gonna go.

RH: How come you guys didn't go to TCA?

NPR&TVW: We weren't invited.

RH: Oh.

NPR: I'm just a lowly podcaster.

RH: I love it.

TVW: I'm even lower than her, I'm just a blogger.

RH: You guys have fun with that, though, that's kinda cool?

[At this point we chat a little about being fans and coming to fan events and I tell them about the gifts I brought for them from NPR]

TVW: Ok, so my site is the ramblings of the TV Whore

RH: Nice. You Whore!

TVW: So, what are you guys obsessed with or addicted to, if anything?

RH: Invisible Children.

JD: Yeah!

TVW: Ok what?

RH: Invisible Children. It's, um. I went to Africa last year for two months, my brother-in-law made this documentary called Invisible Children, here's the bracelet. And it's about this war in Northern Uganda that's been going on for about 20 years and child soldiers, the rebels over there, they abduct children at night to become child soldiers, anyway, um and so a lot of my wife and I's time is spent volunteering and helping and like last year we went, and right now she's back. I wasn't able to go. She's there for a month and just getting our friends involved. Jason's actually involved with the organization that's gonna help promote, not Invisible Children, but ways to help globally, things like that.

JD: Human Rights.

RH: Human Rights, which is totally right up that alley. Um, so my obsession is with that.

TVW: You are so much better of a person than me.

RH: Oh stop! No! So yeah, it's amazing. They were on Oprah, I got to be in the audience for Oprah. Pretty sweet. Right now they are meeting with Participant, which is a huge production company in LA to make a feature documentary and it's just blowing up and it's really going to help end this war. It's amazing. Invisiblechildren.com. You get all the bracelets. I actually, I'm actually uh. If you buy a bracelet, it's the innocence bracelet, its the first one that came out, it's me in Africa kind of telling innocence stories, it's a 10 minute little short.

JD: It's a kid.

RH: Yeah, who's affected by the war in Africa. So it's kind of me and him hanging out. It's really cool. You guys should check it out. It's awesome.

NPR: Very cool.

[To our listeners; For more information on Invisible Children, please check out www.invisiblechildren.com]

JD: He had cornrows and shit when he came back.

RH: [laughs] Yeah.

NPR: I think I've seen pictures of you with the cornrows. So now I can put it in context. .

TVW: Now you know what it is.

NPR: [to Jason, so naturally I screw it up] So, do you have anything, besides acting, or Veronica Mars or your lovely wife and family, is there anything that you're incredibly passionate about?

JD: Um, no. That would be it.

NPR: Those are kinda big things.

[laughs]

NPR: I say them like it's dismissive, but its pretty huge.

TVW: What, besides your job and your wife...

[laughs]

NPR: As I started going through, I'm sorry, as I started going through I realized how lame of a question it was so I have an even more lame question.

JD: Yeah, go ahead-ooof!

[Once again the recording becomes a big blur, this time because Michael has attempted to recreate Jason's amazing chair jumping stunt but he doesn't do it quite as artfully, and I'm pretty sure he has permanently injured Jason.]

[Big laughs which, thankfully, divert attention from the fool I made of myself moments before. Thanks, Michael!]

MM: That wasn't nearly as smooth.

JD: I think your balls just rubbed down my back.

[Whoos! Ahh! Wows! all around]

MM: It didn't quite work out so well. Sorry about that.

JD: It's ok.

MM: My balls are magnetic, don't [sentence mumbled by laughter]

JD: Wow, well it was nice.

NPR: Ok, well this is like, a really quick question. Cause I'm a huge poker nerd-

JD: You play poker?

NPR: -I play a poker. Yeah.

JD: Me too!

NPR: Yeah, I play a lot of poker. They play a lot of poker on the show, or at least they did first season.

JD: Yeah, dude, did you just love that episode?

NPR: I did!

JD: That episode was dope.

RH: Dick was supposed to be in it.

NPR: Except I had total issues with Weevil's call in the first scene.

JD: Yeah, totally.

NPR: LIke, you would never make that call.

JD: Ace, two. Yeah.

RH: What was the call?

JD: Ace two.

NPR: You would never call an all in with a pair of Aces, bottom kicker.

RH: Whoa! You really know-

JD: He has three outs!

NPR: Yeah. You would never make that call. I felt really bad for Logan.

JD: So did I, dude! He had pocket J's dude, hooks, and he lost.

NPR: Yeah.

JD: Shit.

RH: Jack is good.

MM: Johnson and Johnson if you know what I'm saying.

[laughs]

MM: Frickin' uh, fricken double Js.

[laughs]

MM: Pulling a J-squared.

MM: What do they call... Pocket, pocket poopers.

TVW: Don't look at me!

RH: What are pocket Jacks called.

JD: Hooks, hooks.

RH: What else, though?

MM: They call them hooks and they call them

RH: Siegfried and Roy, right. Siegfried and Roy are the Queens, right?

[right!]

NPR: Do you know what the Jack/King is called now?

RH: Yes.

MM: The Just Kidding?

RH: No,

NPR: Now it's called the Harry Potter hand. [Which, despite their mocking, is TOTALLY TRUE and not named by me!] Because of JK Rowling.

JD: Oh my God.

RH: Oh my God. That's a stretch.

NPR; That's the newest one I've seen named.

JD: That is awful.

TVW: Do you call it that?

NPR: I didn't name it!

MM: I was told they're calling the CW the "Michael Muhney"

[laughs]

MM: The initials match.

JD: Do you know what Aces and Eights is called?

NPR: [knows but once again is rendered stupid by the gaze of Jason Dohring] No!

JD: Dead Man's Hand. Because that was the hand that, on Deadwood, the guy, what's his name?

TVW: I can't remember his name.

NPR: I can't remember his name but I've only seen a few episodes of Deadwood.

JD: Wild Bill Hickock. That was the hand he was holding when, Aces and Eights, when he got shot by that guy that Brad Pitt's doing the movie about.

RH: Jesse James.

JD: It was not, was that Jesse James?

MM: Jesse James! Also known as the hooks.

RH: Is it?

MM: No. [laughs] The initials match.

[laughs]

RH: Well a Jack and a Five are, Jacks and Fives. That's not even a good hand so.

JD: Yeah.

RH: We used.

JD: We used to play poker a lot in the beginning, KB played with us, back in the first season.

NPR: Who's the best poker player on set?

JD: Probably me.

[laughs]

JD: Well, I mean 'cause I play a lot.

MM: Me.

JD: Me.

[Jason and Michael bicker a bit about this, each raising his hand and insisting that, no really, he is the best]

RH: I'll say, I'll say me.

NPR: You're gonna say you?

RH: Yeah.

NPR: I think we should all play, and I'll make the decision. I'm just throwing it out there.

[I'd like to say there were laughs here but...there weren't. They pretty much just looked at me like I was crazy.]

NPR: So, where are we going to start season 3? Is it gonna be in flashbacks like in season 2?

JD: No! I don't think we're gonna have a lot of flashbacks this year. Which is cool. Um, because some of them were a little confusing I think, last year, for the general audience, you know? Some of them were harder to shoot, like they looked real cool on paper but it was kinda like, when you got around to shooting it was like, in a bus and it's kind of hard to shoot. So, uh,

MM: There are, however...in the second episode...but it's not gonna be a frequent.

JD: Yeah. There's not gonna be as many I don't think.

[Jason starts messing with his hair]

JD: I'm growing my hair out, so it's like...

TVW: I actually have a question about the hair. Who controls the hair? You?

JD: I do. I've always done my own hair.

MM: Look at mine? Look how long mine is. Rob says as long as I don't have a soul-

RH: Except for Dick. Dick has to keep his hair like this.

JD: [to Ryan] I LOVE this hair, though.

MM: [to Ryan] Your hair is awesome.

RH: Thank you. Don't let me touch it.

NPR: It's the flip of that hair that got you the, the two season regular gig, so-

[laughs]

RH: I know, I know.

MM: Yeah, it's not any kind of talent you have at all.

[laughs all around]

MM: It's the hair.

NPR: Wow, I keep saying really stupid things.

[They keep laughing at me]

NPR: No! It's because earlier he said...[during the whole "Logan!" discussion]

RH: It's true. It's the hair.

JD: He's fantastic.

RH: Actually it's the hair stylist. She gets all the props.

MM: Well then I'm gonna start doing my hair like that.

RH: Yeah I mean.

JD: It's just such a great character. Isn't it a phenomenal character?

NPR: It's a wonderful character! I-

RH: No no, stop.

NPR: Ok, well I had a question that actually applies to all three of you. There seems to be a lot of popularity now with anti-heroes. Sort of, with Rescue Me, and on 24, and you guys-

MM: And Lost.

NPR: Yeah, on Lost, Sawyer on Lost, and you guys all sort of play

JD: Jerks?

[laughs]

NPR: Yeah, but everybody loves all of you. So how do you do that? How do you play-

MM: Is it the guy you love to hate or the guy you hate to love?

JD: I don't know.

MM: They typecast the three of us, so.

NPR: You're all naturally evil and that's why?

JD: I don't know. I really don't know the answer to that. It's kind of a funny thing. Well, I think there are certain qualities about people that make them appealing to audience, like smart, I think. You know what I mean? Which is Rob, through us, you know what I mean? Like, writing such great dialogue. Being good, I think, at whatever you do. Like, if you see a great villain, you just fucking love the intensity that he brings, you know I mean? Like you see Ben Kingsley, you know what I mean? Just the worst guy.

RH: Sexybeast.

JD: Whose name is Don Logan, by the way. Um, and, you just see people who are very good at what they do and I think it's just fucking great to watch them and just like, just great fucking lines, dude. You just fucking love it! You know, you can just feel for him. I dunno. If you see a bad actor playing a bad guy, you know what I mean? You don't like it.

NPR: Yeah.

MM: It's attractive, in that you're drawn to it, but you might be repelled by the person but you are still attracted to the manner.

[At this point in the interview we are joined by the people from tvaddict.com who will be asking the questions from here on out. While both TVWhore and I stuck around, I'll direct you to tvaddictonline for further responses: www.thetvaddict.com]

Once again, I'd like to thank Michael Muhney, Ryan Hansen, and Jason Dohring for giving us such an entertaining afternoon. Thanks to the people at Warner Brothers for setting up the interviews. Hopefully the guys forgive me for sticking my foot in my mouth MULTIPLE times. What can I say, I was prepared for individual awesomeness. The trifecta of awesome threw me into a tailspin. Now I'm left to wait impatiently for season 3.

Oh! In case anyone cares: Pocket Jacks are also called Jokers, Wild Bill Hickock was actually killed by James McCall, and the Jesse James hand in poker is actually a 5/4.

See you next week, Pirates!