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This podcast is produced by fans of Veronica Mars, and is in no way affiliated with the UPN/CW network, Rob Thomas, or The Powers That Be, and does not reflect the views of any of the entities creating and producing the show. Skip to: THEO: Aargh, Veronica Mars’ fans. You’re listening to Neptune Pirate Radio. [OPENING THEME MUSIC: Vancefurd- Pirate Song] SANDY: Ahoy Pirates, we’re back, and it’s time for yet another podcast, and this time it’s our pre-finale podcast and I don’t know about you guys, but I am really excited. THEO: I- I’m counting the hours until Tuesday. I’m so excited about this. How about you Scarlett? MANSCARLETT: I’m sort of excited. SANDY: You don’t- THEO: Just a little? SANDY: You don’t sound very excited. THEO: I don’t hear that Scarlett enthusiasm. I don’t hear it. Sandy? MANSCARLETT: [emphatic] I am sort of excited! THEO: Yup. I think that’ll do it. I think that’s a lot better. SANDY: It’s the, it’s the sort of that’s not really selling it for me, less than the volume. [Laughter] THEO: I’m moderately excited! You just, you can’t do it. It’s gotta be- I need to hear it. I need to hear it. I’m sorry. SANDY: I think- MANSCARLETT: [high-pitched] I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it! SANDY: There you go. There you go. THEO: I think you’re about to lose control, and I like it. SANDY: I think what you’re missing is a little Hands in Pants. I think we need you to shout Hands in Pants for our listeners just so, you know, we really get the full effect. The Scarlett enthusiasm. MANSCARLETT: [pitchy w/odd accent] Hands in Pants! SANDY: There you go. There you go. I feel better now. [THEO laughs high-pitched] THEO: Ah. I feel right at home. SANDY: Me too. Um. All right. Well. There is so much going on this week. We have the finale coming up, like we said. Um. We have the tragic, tragic news that we did not win the SOS poll at E!Online. We came in second. THEO: Well. I just want to say, thank you to everyone that voted. We really do appreciate it. We did come in second, which is a very distinguished and honorable showing, I think. [CAMERON: Not according to Vin Diesel.] SANDY: Yeah. THEO: So uh, thank you to all the viewers who voted several times, so. SANDY: And in addition to coming in second I know this week there is, um, a lot going on with the, you know- we put out a special bulletin about this earlier and hopefully a lot of our subscribers caught it, but in case you didn’t, going on right now, scheduled to take place on May 9th, is the Look to the Skies campaign, which was developed by Internet fans from all sorts of different sites. I’m- I can’t wait for May 9th. I wanna see what the media reaction is right now. THEO: Well what, how what- explain to us exactly what’s included in this Look to the Skies. SANDY: Well there are several things that are gonna take place. For starters, there have been car packages that have been made that are gonna be delivered to all the major media types. Kristin Vietch, Mike Ausiello, Dawn Ostroff- everybody. THEO: I’ve seen pictures of some of the things that are included. It’s uh, Hearst college paraphernalia. I’ve seen some great T-shirts with the Hearst college logo on them. Uh, I’ve seen some Hearst college pom-poms. SANDY: The hats. THEO: I’ve seen some Hearst- I’ve seen the Hearst college hat. And I have to say they’re amazing. I- SANDY: I love them. THEO: My compliments to the people who thought of this because they’re, they’re so well done. SANDY: They really did an excellent job. Yeah. MANSCARLETT: And in addition, there’s even a recommendation letter from uh, Veronica’s guidance counselor, recommending her to Hearst University, the CW television studies program, I think it is. SANDY: Yeah it looks fantastic. THEO: That’s great. That’s great. SANDY: I think- MANSCARLETT: The theme of characters getting involved is also going on right now. Dawn Ostroff is getting flowers delivered to her office all week from various characters. Apparently Aaron delivered her Lil- it’s delivered to Veronica, basically to look like as a graduation gift. SANDY: Right. MANSCARLETT: I think Aaron delivered her lilies, and- SANDY: It’s just so creepy. So creepy. MANSCARLETT: Wallace has given her stuff. Duncan has given her stuff. I forgot who all is really delivering, but it’s… SANDY: Yeah. It seems like almost every major character. In addition there’s the DVD library campaign, which is also taking place, which is something that our listeners can do if you wanna participate. Um, I think it’s something like 100 DVD sets have been donated to local libraries all over the country. THEO: Wow. SANDY: And if you want to help out, call up your local library. See if they allow DVDs to be part of their circulation, if they accept donations. And if they accept donations, they don’t have Veronica, or they only have one copy of Veronica, go pick up a cheap copy of the DVDs. They’re on sale right now at all major distributors, and donate a set to your local library. MANSCARLETT: Yeah the idea really stemmed about from- cause somebody looked at the New York library system, and they had one copy with 56 people on the waiting list. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: Which is just sad. MANSCARLETT: And so people decided that we should just hit some of the major markets. In the beginning we thought, oh, we’re only gonna have enough money to say, buy 30 sets or so. Or maybe one per major market. And now it’s ballooned into something where it’s, you know, every library’s gotta have one by now. THEO: Mhmm. SANDY: Yeah. I think it’s terrific. And the final thing, I think this is all culminating in the event that’s taking place on May 9th, which is when an airplane is gonna fly a letter banner for two hours during the morning rush hour, and two hours during the afternoon rush hour on the 405 in LA, leading the way from the old UPN offices in Los Angeles to the new CW offices in Burbank, sort of showing the way from Veronica’s old home to hopefully, her new home. Which I think is gonna be fantastic. THEO: Wow. I can’t wait to see pictures of that. That is gonna be incredible. SANDY: [Channels Trump] It’s gonna be huge. MANSCARLETT: It is the day on which the term CW becomes Cloud Watchers. SANDY: That’s right. That’s the theme for the campaign. It’s- the CW stands for something different. MANSCARLETT: I think it’s extremely clever. The person who made it up is just really awesome. SANDY: Yeah. I wonder who that was. Um, and speaking of wondering who people are, I don’t- I’m starting to doubt- something sounds really weird about you, Scarlett. THEO: I- Scarlett, do you have a cold or some sort of flu? MANSCARLETT: It could be the bird flu… or wait. I actually went to the doctor on Friday. He said it was the cow flu. SANDY: The cow flu. Oh. THEO: I think that explains a lot. SANDY: Yeah. I think it explains an awful lot. In fact, I think it explains enough for us to know that you’re not in fact our little, our dear, awesome little Scarlett after all. THEO: Our wee, Scottish lass. SANDY: Our, uh, yes. I don’t think you’re Scarlett at all. So why don’t you, why don’t you do us all a favor and just tell us who you really are. MANSCARLETT: I suppose I must reveal myself to be Polter-Cow, from Television Without Pity. SANDY: Well welcome. [CAMERON: SHOCKED! But finally a name I can abbreviate.] PC: And I would’ve gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling kids. [Laughter] THEO: Ah. SANDY: We’re too sneaky. We’ve learned too much from Veronica. We’re crafty. It’s all in the- THEO: That’s right. SANDY: I was gonna say it’s all in the eyes except we can’t see you, because we’re talking to you over the Internet. But. THEO: It’s all in the inflection. It’s all in the inflection. SANDY: It’s all in the inflection. We knew it couldn’t be our Scarlett. THEO: That’s right. It had to be the shifty real estate developer trying to replace the- Sorry. SANDY: Um. Yes. Everybody out there, our Scarlett couldn’t make it, uh, to this pre-finale podcast. She sent in a couple little tidbits and we’ll definitely slip them in throughout the podcast because it just wouldn’t be the same if she wasn’t here at all. THEO: Yes. She’ll be back next week. SANDY: Yes. She will be back next week for our post-finale podcast. But this week we do have from um, both Television Without Pity and the LiveJournal community, both the Veronica Mars boards on Television Without Pity and the Veronica Mars LiveJournal community’s; we have Polter-Cow who’s joined us today. But before we let you get any further, you sneaky little cow, we have to make you do Two Truths and a Lie. It’s the rules. THEO: Yes. SANDY: It’s the rules. Are you ready? PC: Okay. I guess I’m ready. THEO: Three statements, please. PC: All right. Statement Number One: Like Veronica, I was accepted to Stanford but I ended up going to a really good private school closer to my home. SANDY: Ooh. PC: Number Two: I helped fund a Tegan and Sara music video. SANDY: Ooh. Okay. PC: And Number Three: I dislocated my shoulder on a football field. SANDY: Hmm. THEO: Hm. SANDY: Um. THEO: I’m gonna take a guess and I’m gonna say you actually did not help fund a Tegan and Sara music video. SANDY: [voice of disbelief] That’s your guess? THEO: That’s my guess. That’s my guess for the lie. SANDY: Um. See. Okay. Now I remember I’ve- hmm. From what I’ve read about you, you’re a big Tegan and Sara fan, so I could see you helping fund a video through some sort of campaign, much like the Look to the Skies campaign, which has raised over $7,000. Sorry. I just had to slip that in. [Laughter] SANDY: I’m sneaky like that. Um. I think you didn’t really dislocate your shoulder on a football field. I think it was probably like a soccer field or something. Close, but no cigar. So why don’t you- what is it? Who’s right? Tell me it’s me. PC: Neither one of you are right. [CAMERON: OH! SNAP!] [Gasps] SANDY: Oh. THEO: Wow. Way to ruin our faith in your academic prowess there. PC: Yup. I totally did not get into Stanford. And I did help fund a Tegan and Sara music video. They, they actually- they wanted to film an extra video, and they didn’t have any money from their label. So they sold some shirts on their website, and I bought one, and they used the proceeds for that, to help make a video for Living Room on the If it was You album. SANDY: Nice. THEO: How clever. PC: I did dislocate my shoulder on a football field, but it wasn’t playing football. I was actually in the band. [Cameron totally knew he would say that. Heh.] SANDY: Oh. THEO: Oh well. SANDY: Well there we go. Well now I feel like you’re all indoctrinated. Um. [Laughter] SANDY: So. One of the other things that I think is huge news, especially for Theo, is the lack of preemption for New York for the finale! Woo! [CAMERON: WOOOOOO!!!!] THEO: I rest easily. I am so- it’s- this is the first time- I have missed the uh, last two episodes [three Theo, it was three] live. I’ve had to catch them all through uh, fervent downloading. So uh, I have been downloading my little heart off. But uh, I finally got them about a day after they air, and I am so mad at the uh, New Jersey Nets. I can’t speak. So, uh. SANDY: Yes. But let’s be happy that they’re playing on Monday and not on Tuesday, which means that your finale-con is gonna go off without a hitch, right? THEO: I know. Which I’m excited to attend. And uh, it’s actually- the information for it is on our website under extras. So if anyone wants to come say hello, have a drink, watch the uh, podcast, you’re welcome to show up and uh, enjoy the finale of Veronica Mars season two. PC: Will someone brink snickerdoodles? THEO: Uh, I hope so. I won’t. But I will certainly enjoy them if they’re there. SANDY: Yeah. You don’t want Theo baking. You don’t want him bringing the baked goods. THEO: HEY NOW. I can bring it in the kitchen. But uh, that’s not gonna happen this week, so. SANDY: You know- PC: That place that you’re gonna get together with your finale-con would be a good place to uh, marathon season two when the DVDs come out this August. THEO: That, that’s a good idea. I will pose it when we get there and hopefully we’ll have some uh, good news about that too. When do they come out? PC: August 15th, which just happens to be Rob’s birthday, coincidentally enough. [Cameron thinks PC luuuuurves Rob.] THEO: I did not know that. SANDY: Ooh. See. You have all the Rob knowledge. PC: It’s on his website guys, come on. [CAMERON: Oh. My bad.] [Laughter] SANDY: Oh, then it really just means that I’m a… bad fan. PC: You’re very bad. THEO: Yes. You’re a very bad fan. SANDY: I’m gonna slap my own wrists. Um. THEO: Now who’s Rob? I’m just kidding. [Laughter] SANDY: Why is that important? Yeah. I’m so excited we’re getting the season two DVDs. That’s huge. And definitely, definitely grounds for cons again all over the country. PC: Yeah. And I hear they’re gonna have gag reels on them. And maybe some little- it’s like a featurette. Like, Kristin was talking about the gag reel in Austin, or some other interview, but it looks like they’re gonna have a gag reel of both seasons, which’ll be fun. SANDY: That would be totally fun. THEO: Oh that’ll be great. SANDY: ‘Cause we’ve already said. The season one DVDs are lacking in the extras department. Um, speaking of the cons though, if you’re going to a con, and it’s open to the public, once again; send us an email and let us know. We’ll put it on our site. If you’re going to a con and it’s not open to the public, if it’s just at somebody’s house - which is the case with my own con that I’m going to, it’s at somebody’s private residence – still feel free to record little segments from that con, people’s reactions, and send them in to us. Because we would love to have a complete reel on our post-finale podcast of sort of reactions from across the country. THEO: Mhmm. SANDY: So even if it’s not open to the public, record yourselves getting excited about the finale, or getting excited after the finale is over, and send them our way. PC: Expressions of shock when you find out who caused the bus crash. SANDY: Exactly. THEO: Yes. PC: The collective gasps. SANDY: Shh. We don’t know that we’re gonna find that out! No spoilers for the finale! [Laughter] THEO: Oh, yeah. We’ll- like we’re really worried that we’re not gonna find out what the big solution to the big mystery is. SANDY: I don’t- I don’t wanna know anything. Don’t talk about it. THEO: Actually, they’re just gonna rerun some Masterpiece Theatre for an hour. So. PC: There’ll be a clip show of the entire season and at the very end they’ll be like- SANDY: You guys suck! All right. Um. [Laughter] SANDY: On that note, we’re gonna take a little break and we’ll come back after this. See you soon, Pirates. [Cameron has learned never to trust these “breaks,” for they are like the seedy underbelly of Neptune, filled with secret messages and less music than one would expect.] [And Cameron is right! OWNAGE!] NOTDRUNKSCVO: Hey guys, this is Scarlett. Sorry I can’t be there this week but I’m eloping with Troy. If you wanna email me at scarlett@neptunepirateradio.com, I’ll see you next week. Bye! [Dudes. Cameron knows that Scarlett was forced to record that at gunpoint. Probably Cassidy’s gunpoint, as will be theorized later. Just saying.] MARYVO: Hi, I’m Mary, and this is my final prediction for the person who crashed the bus, which is… Duncan. Because we haven’t seen him in a while. I mean he is in the credits. So, I mean okay, it wouldn’t really go over that well when he comes like, back and he’s like, “Hey. I crashed the bus.” And we’re, “Yeah. But we haven’t seen you in months, so… what are you doing here, you know, confessing?” And then everyone goes like, “Yeah.” But hey, it’s season’s end. We’ve got to resolve this and we bitch a lot. I mean, the whole fandom. That’s gonna be awesome. [Cameron would be smug about her break knowledge. But she is already tired. And the days are so long.] THEO: Welcome back, Veronica Mars’ fans. And now, it’s my favorite time when we uh, when Sandy, Scarlett’s replacement and I, discuss the episode for this week, which was very, very interesting. SANDY: I loved it. I was shaking. My heart was pounding for an hour afterwards. I was talking to Bailey after it was over, and we got on the phone and were just, I think, shouting, “Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God.” For like, 10 minutes. Straight. I’m not- you think I’m kidding. I’m really not. THEO: No. No I believe you completely. SANDY: It was so good. THEO: I have total faith in you. In fact, if you were testifying I would give you full credit. SANDY: Aw. THEO: And you would be completely- SANDY: So long as you didn’t find out I had Chlamydia. In which case. THEO: Well. We’ve had this discussion and that’s okay with me. So, uh. Speaking of which, the trial. The big verdict this week. PC: Yeah. I actually shouted profanities at my screen. THEO: Yeah. Yes. Definitely. PC: Even though it was pretty much inevitable given, you know, this is a noir show and the guilty aren’t gonna be punished. THEO: Of course. PC: But still. I shouted profanities at my screen. THEO: Oh yes. And even though I assure you Sandy, and I can go on and on about the flaws in this, we won’t. We will just say, I guess I’m not surprised either. He’s a celebrity. He’s gonna get away with it. Plus… I don’t know. There’s more- I have to say, I think there’s more coming. SANDY: Yeah. You know, here’s my take on it. Like you said, you know. Particularly as lawyers we could go on and on and on about everything in the episode that didn’t match up with the real legal world. But we don’t wanna bore you to death. So. Somebody online - and I thought this was quite brilliant, and I guess I thought about this sort of in the back of my mind, but I hadn’t clearly articulated it yet – is that you’re gonna sleep a lot easier at night and enjoy the show a lot more if you just accept than in Neptune, California, they’ve created this noir universe, like PC mentioned, where the rich are always gonna get off. The guilty are always gonna go free. Justice is never served. And, you know, you can sort of reconcile going back to old episodes- THEO: Oh yes. And that NEVER happens in the real world. [Cameron wipes off the sarcasm that hit her in the face.] SANDY: Well. Yeah. It happens in the real world all the time, but it just goes to an extreme in Neptune so they have to create their own sense of what the legal system is like in order to sort of justify that universe in which they operate. This is what I’m gonna choose to believe, and just move on from it. THEO: Well plus it lets the characters mete out their own justice. SANDY: Right. THEO: As we’ve seen with Felix, uh, Felix’s murder and Thumper’s punishment, I guess you could call it. I think I’m interested in seeing how uh, Aaron is punished, and sort of the non-judicial system. SANDY: Well I like, you know, you were just talking about characters meting their own punishments. One of the things that I loved about the episode – and clearly a lot of this stuff would never come out in a real trial – but what I loved was seeing for once, Logan’s actions come back and have genuine consequences. Veronica’s past actions come back and have genuine consequences. Because we sort of see these characters do things all the time that are… not necess- you know, they might be for good reasons but they’re not the right or the most moral methods. And there’s really no consequence to that. We don’t really see direct effects of things they’ve done in the past, and here you know, we saw what happened as a result of Veronica helping Duncan skip town. And we saw what happened as a result of Logan burning the tapes and breaking into the Manning’s house and lying to your dad, and those sort of things, you know, it came back and sort of cost them this really huge price. Which I kind of thought was interesting that there was some sort of… I don’t know. Retaliation’s not the right word. But, you know there was- PC: Determination. [CAMERON: Huh?] SANDY: Yes. Yeah. I thought that was interesting. [Cameron assures you that Theo is still breathing in the background.] PC: After the thing you mentioned about the Manning’s house, that was actually my favorite part of the trial when even though his lawyer was doing all this sort of shady stuff that you might not have in a trial, but his scene where he, you know, mentioned all the stuff that Keith should have known about his daughter, and you know- I don’t think we as viewers knew that Keith didn’t know about what Veronica was doing for some of those things. SANDY: Yeah. PC: And it really helped bring back that, the old trust issues between them. It seemed like it cooled down recently ‘cause they were working together, but now it might bring back because she knows- she’s still been keeping all this stuff from him. SANDY: Yeah. THEO: Mhmm. SANDY: No I definitely think that that’s true and that there are still fractures in that relationship which, which might come into play in the finale episode. You know, maybe- obviously from this episode we know that Veronica’s blown off her final and she’s not- at least we’re left with the impression that she’s not gonna go to Stanford. So she’s, you know, part of what might make her decision to stay closer to home is to try and rebuild that fractured relationship she has with Keith rather than leaving right when everything is not necessarily at it’s best between the two of them. Maybe it’ll come back into play there. But. The look on Aaron’s face, how priceless was that? THEO: Ech. PC: Well he does have that Oscar. THEO: Yeah. Two. SANDY: Or more. PC [Whose name keeps being mistyped as OC and is only corrected because the transcriber wants nothing to do with anything that makes her think of Mischa Barton and gives her skinny nightmares]: Maybe even actually- or three. Or four. Possibly. [Laugher] THEO: Four. And don’t forget the, you know, Adapted Screenplay, so. SANDY: Yes. THEO: Also, another thing this week I should mention. I loved the scenes with the reuniting of Mac and Beaver to tutor Weevil. SANDY: Oh yeah. THEO: I thought that was amazing. SANDY: Yeah, I think it means Beaver’s evil. [CAMERON: HA!] [CAMERON: Double HA!] SANDY: There’s something more to that relationship than just seeing cute Mac and Beaver time. PC: Well what’s actually important about that scene was in the background you could see this I heart Pi t-shirt… [Laugher] PC: And that was pretty awesome. Pi like the transcendental number, not pie like Veronica wanted from Gia. SANDY: Like 3.14 on on on on… PC: Not pep-squad pie. Although pep-squad pie would be really interesting. THEO: That’s true. SANDY: Um. Okay. I won’t go there. THEO: Speaking of which. I think whenever anyone saves a life they should get a cupcake. Because I think the world would be a better place. Save a Life. Get a Cupcake. That’s my motto from now on. SANDY: Now- I finally got that. I’ve been looking at that Away message from you for like, a week. [THEO laughter] SANDY: And it just now occurred to me what it meant. Now I understand. THEO: That’s what it means. SANDY: I’m slow. THEO: Because you know what, if everyone that saved a life would get a cupcake, I’d have a bakery. PC: And a cupcake with a flower on top. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: Yes. They were fancy. You know what I really want- THEO: What a very Gia thing to do, though. SANDY: I know. THEO: I have to say she’s just- PC: I love Gia. THEO: -a little out there. I love her too. I love her too. PC: So funny. THEO: But she is just out there. SANDY: Krysten Ritter rocks. I was so suspect of her. She’s great. PC: Yeah she’s really funny. I- her funniest line this week was the thing about MySpace. Which, I don’t know saying how many MySpace friends do you have? Do you have a thousand and you’re only down to nine hundred or something now? THEO: I have tens of thousands. [Sighs] SANDY: Yes. This week after I made the One Tree Hill remark last week my MySpace numbers went down. [Laughter] THEO: We heard from those. We heard from them. SANDY: Yes. Although, I should say we sort of- I think it was a good lesson to our listeners. I’m just gonna make a little aside here. It was a good lesson to our listeners that you don’t mock other fandoms or you pay the price. We mocked One Tree Hill, they won the SOS poll. See what happens? No more mocking other fandoms. THEO: We live and let live. We live and let live. SANDY: Yes. Exactly. We focus on Veronica. [CAMERON: Whatever. It’s that kind of attitude that’ll get you suddenly engaged to Chad Michael Murray as one of his child-brides in his own personal spinoff of Big Love.] SANDY: Um. What I really wanted was that bowl of study fuel that she made, that ice cream. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: ‘Cause that looked like a killer dish of ice cream. And I can’t believe- I know Veronica was trying to get out of there. But I know how my girl likes ice cream. So I can’t believe she didn’t stick around. THEO: Well not only that, but absolutely. You know, you’ve got a potential pervert in the room, and a daughter who’s just on the edge of crazy, but do you walk away from ice cream? Do you walk away from ice cream? PC: I don’t think Gia’s crazy. I think she’s just clueless. [Laughter] THEO: I think she’s, she’s- no I agree. I think she may just be clueless. She’s acting a little crazy. SANDY: She worked out of that family okay cause she’s a girl and wasn’t part of um, Woody’s target demographic. Speaking of- THEO: Well we don’t really know. I mean. Potentially. SANDY: -How creepy… THEO: Who knows? SANDY: Mayor McCreepy doesn’t do it justice anymore. Mayor McGoodwood, I think is the new name. [Sounds of disgust] THEO: See. That’s just a nickname that we don’t have to talk about. SANDY: How awful is he? I- Steve Guttenberg. I- I officially love you now. Because I- THEO: Absolutely. Props to Steve Guttenberg, wherever he is. PC: He really ratcheted up the creepy in this episode. THEO: He did. SANDY: He knocked it out of the park. I mean- PC: He’s got all the- he was, you know, standing in the doorway and looming over Veronica’s shoulder, and yeah… SANDY: I mean this is the guy from Police Academy and Three Men and a Little Lady. THEO: Let’s not forget Three Men and a- SANDY: Three Men and a Little Lady. THEO: Three Men and a Baby. Three Men and a Little Baby? SANDY: Three Men and a Little Lady! PC: Three Men and a Really Large Baby. [Laughter] SANDY: That’s the sequel! That’s the sequel to Three Men and a Baby. THEO: Three Men and a Fetus. SANDY: He, you know- THEO: Three Men and a Glint in Her Father’s Eye. [Cameron thinks that if she has to type “Three Men and a” one more time there is going to be EPIC bloodshed. She refuses to make a macro for “Three Men.”] SANDY: This is no fun without Scarlett here. I need my other girl. Hands in Pants! That’s just for you Scarlett. THEO: Oh, Hands in Pants. SANDY: Um. No. But like I, you know, I think I read in an interview with Steve Guttenberg not that long ago where he sort of talked about how he doesn’t need the money. He could never act again. He’d be fine. So he sort of only takes roles that he thinks are sort of really interesting or challenging and boy, did he take on an interesting and challenging role here. And I don’t know what this show does for the 80s B-list actors that makes them awesome, but between him and Harry Hamlin, I think these are performances of their careers. In my opinion. [THEO laughs] SANDY: They’re so good. THEO: But have you seen Clash of the Titans lately? I mean really. PC: Hey that’s an awesome, awesome movie. It’s not mechanical at all. THEO: It’s EPIC. SANDY: It’s epic. THEO: Sorry. I should probably not use that word, as there’s some debate as to the meaning of that word at this point. PC: It means whatever you want it to mean now. SANDY: Was there lives ruined? Was there bloodshed? Um. THEO: It’s a very fungible definition. SANDY: Yeah. Well I think, uh, Mayor McCreepyGoodwood was amazing this week. And I think my favorite line of the whole episode was, “You don’t scare me Woody.” Or, “I’m not a 15-year old boy, Woody. You don’t scare me.” So great. THEO: That was well delivered. Very well delivered. Absolutely. SANDY: And following up, it was following Keith’s other killer line which is- PC: Yeah. Right. SANDY: -I uh, what was it? PC: It was… ah. Crap. I’m actually using it for his bio. I wrote his Mars Investigations bio. I’m using that under his bio. Like, “I don’t usually get my children to do espionage for me.” And Keith is like, “Well. I keep my hands…” I don’t… I suck. SANDY: “I keep my hands off other people’s children.” That’s it. Which is awesome. THEO: That’s what it is. [CAMERON: Almost.] SANDY: I love that line. THEO: It is a great line. SANDY: It is a great line. THEO: He’s an incredible actor. I caught a few episodes of- PC: Just Shoot Me? THEO: -Just Shoot Me, lately. SANDY: I love that show. THEO: And I- comparing that to Veronica Mars, he’s just such a talented actor. SANDY: Have you seen Galaxy Quest? THEO: I have! And I- SANDY: I love Galaxy Quest. I’m such a Galaxy Quest fangirl. And I love him in that. PC: I’m out of the Galaxy Quest loop. [CAM: So am I. Let’s make our own Loop. We’ll put it on FOX.] [Gasps] SANDY: You call yourself a Veronica fan and you haven’t seen Galaxy Quest? PC: I- I’m sorry. THEO: Hey, let’s not mock. Let’s not mock. Let’s treat the guest host with a little bit of civility here Sandy. PC: Please don’t kick me out! SANDY: I’m just disappointed. I’m just disappointed. THEO: She’s- I think you should- she’s very sorry. SANDY: I’m a little hurt. PC: I’ve seen some of the Police Academy movies. SANDY: That helps. THEO: Very good. SANDY: That helps a little. THEO: Very good. SANDY: Yes. Well I was just totally digging this episode. Let’s talk about the message. We only heard two of the boys on the message. We didn’t hear three. PC: Okay. I thought you meant the message of the episode, which is that evil always gets off. SANDY: Evil people always get off. PC: He gets away. SANDY: No. THEO: Oh. Nice. SANDY: Um. Which is better than this week’s message on Lost, which is um, get a DUI and we’ll kill you off the show. Just kidding! [Laughter] SANDY: Um. Hope everybody out there’s seen Lost! I didn’t ruin anything for you. Um. Oops! Uh, Spoiler! Um. But going back to the show- [Laughs] THEO: There was a- there was a spoiler three minutes ago… [Laughter] SANDY: Exactly. Um. Yes. Okay. Anyway, moving on. THEO: Okay. PC: Actually I wanna sing my Woody Goodman song. SANDY: You have a Woody Goodman song? [Cameron wonders why the hosts hate her.] PC: It’s Stone the Stonecutter by Stonecutter. Have you not seen the Woody Goodman bio on www.marsinvestigations.net? SANDY: No. PC: It’s a takeoff of the Stonecutter’s song. SANDY: Sure… PC: It goes- actually this’ll be the new updated version. So. PCSONG: Who controls the baseball team? [There is much laughter.] THEO: Very good. SANDY: That is awesome. Congratulations. Giving you a little clap [not that clap, we hope]. [CAMERON: Thank you. Oh. You weren’t talking to me?] THEO: Excellent. SANDY: Oh. Scarlett’s gonna be so mad. Not only are you taking over her hosting gig for the week but you’re taking over her song gig as well. We still love you and need you Scarlett! THEO: Polter-Cow, we are going to look- PC: You can put that as a commercial or something if you want. SANDY: Well. It’s in the actual discussion. THEO: We are gonna look deep in your heart and assign you a number in the order of which you joined. That is what we’re gonna do for you. SANDY: Um. All right. Well. Let’s keep going with the episode discussion. THEO: Yes. SANDY: And let’s talk about this recording. So there were two voices on the recording, right? THEO: Yes. SANDY: We’ve identified two of those voices. We still need to identify the 3rd. My guess: Beaver. I think it’s Beaver. THEO: Yeah. PC: Yeah. I think that was everyone’s guess. SANDY: Shut up! I’m trying to be clever. Let me for once! [Laughter] PC: Oh, are you trying to feel smart? [Laughter] THEO: This is what? I’ve never heard that before? Beaver? Wow! SANDY: Shut up! THEO: All right. SANDY: Well ‘cause the message was kill incorpor- THEO: No. PC: I mean it’s a very strange disconnect, I think, between us and everyone else. I think the online fandom is all about Beaver everywhere. But I don’t think the casual viewer would ever suspect Beaver as being involved in any of it. SANDY: Yeah. I think it does make a difference like, how much time you spend online. And I do spend time online reading message boards. So I do. I know actually that other people think it’s Beaver. I’m not really caught off guard. But I do think, you know, that there’s a big difference between the ability to sort of piece things together when you follow the online community and the ability to piece things together when you’re sort of just casually watching at home. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: But. Yeah. Clearly, the Kill Incorporation or Else, Beaver wanted incorporation to die, obviously, ‘cause it benefits his real estate scheme. You know. Could be the threat there. I don’t think that Lucky particularly cared about, you know, killing incorporation. PC: And- THEO: Yeah. The fate of the incorporation. PC: -and the recording was- had like French dialogue in the background, so it could be in a French class. And we met that weird old French teacher in Like a Virgin last season. SANDY: Ooh. THEO: Oh, that’s true. SANDY: Good call. I have not put anything together about the French thing, the people speaking French. PC: Neither did I until just now, but I have to fill that Scarlett void. SANDY: Aah. THEO: Oh that’s true. SANDY: That’s very clever though. THEO: And you have to approach it with the “I want Beaver to die” uh, mindset. So. SANDY: So. Okay. We have options here. Like, it could have been somebody else who recorded the boys unknowingly. So there could be four people involved in this, right? There are the three people involved in the conversation, and the fourth person who just recorded the conversation. So here’s my other theory. Perhaps Beaver overheard Dick having this conversation with the two boys. And maybe, you know, we’ve been saying that Beaver is the one who was molested, and maybe he still is, but maybe he heard this conversation, um, between Dick and the two boys. Or vice versa. You know, so that both Dick and Beaver are sort of involved in this. Because it doesn’t sound- THEO: So essentially, a person black- the person doing the blackmailing doesn’t necessarily have to be one of the voices. SANDY: Right. THEO: It can be someone who sort of overheard the conversation, recorded it, and used it without their consent to blackmail Woody. SANDY: Right. Right. But they would have to have some connection to one of the voices in order to decide to take that voice out. THEO: Certainly. SANDY: You know. PC: It’s true well, if that voice is being taken, well yeah Beaver would take his own brother’s voice out. But I don’t know that it works without Marcos and Peter’s consent because I don’t- do we know anything about- did he like- Beaver doesn’t have any computer skills. He always goes to Mac. And I think the implication is that Marcos, uh, the one who was on Ahoy Matey’s would have that technology, would be able to take out somebody’s voice. Like you guys do on the podcast. Right? SANDY: Right. [CAM: That’s an admission of censorship guilt if I’ve ever seen one.] PC: I mean you guys know how it works. SANDY: Right. PC: But Beaver would not know how it works. SANDY: You know that’s entirely possible too. That’s a really good point. My only reason why I think that- and maybe they got the- I don’t know. Here’s my only problem with thinking that Marcos and Peter were aware is that, you know, with Marcos and Peter it didn’t sound like they were having a conversation that they knew they were recording. Like when we’re recording this podcast for everybody, we’re saying, “Hey guys. Here we are. We’re recording. We’re having a discussion about this.” And we talk as though we know other people are listening. We don’t- PC: They didn’t say, “Hey guys. Woody Goodman touched me down there.” SANDY: Well. No. They’re not saying like, “Woody we know what you did.” They’re saying, “We gotta talk to Woody about this.” THEO: Right. SANDY: So it’s like if we recorded ourselves having our pre-podcast discussion about what we’re gonna talk about versus recording ourselves actually doing the podcast. And I just think it’s weird to send him a conversation about confronting him rather than sending a conversation that confronts him. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: That’s why I think somebody else made the recording. That’s my guess. THEO: I think I agree. I think that’s a very good guess. SANDY: That’s my little two-cents. Is that- is that something that’s all over fandom too? Am I, once again, late coming to the party? PC: No. I think that was an original idea. SANDY: Woohoo! THEO: Wow. PC: Props. THEO: Please. If it is not, please don’t email us three thousand times. [Laughter] SANDY: Yes. Please don’t email. THEO: We’re just doing our best. SANDY: I don’t really care. I don’t really care if it’s all out there on the Internet. I didn’t know. THEO: There’s no cash prize involved. [CAM: Wait, what? What am I getting for all this typing?] SANDY: No. Not this time. PC: Crap. THEO: Sorry. SANDY: Uh. So. Yeah. It really could be anybody. THEO: Found that one out the hard way. SANDY: So what about the fact that the bomb that was used on the bus has the same sort of trigger as the bomb uh, found in Woody’s car? PC: Yeah. That was really interesting. And I can’t tie to Lucky. There’s no way Lucky caused the bus crash. That would be dumb. Like, we just met him. We just, you know, he just came out on the show in the past three episodes. And it can’t be Lucky. THEO: Sure. PC: But it also can’t be Woody because he’s so obvious. SANDY: Oh yeah. THEO: Plus, I don’t think the uh, presents that Lucky was mentioning are uh, necessarily the bombs. I think they were the videotapes. The uh, CD, the DVDs. PC: That could be it. THEO: I just don’t think- I don’t think it’s- the reference to presents is so uh, specific and so unique that it can only mean one thing. It can only mean bombs. PC: And Veronica is a professional conclusion jumper. [Cameron has a mat she’d like.] SANDY: Yes. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: Very true. THEO: She needs- yes she is. SANDY: She gets blinded by her own viewpoint and definitely jumps to conclusions. Just because he used presents to mean one thing in the past doesn’t mean he necessarily means that the same way in the future. It could be any sort of nasty little surprise that you get he could be using presents for ironically. So. Um. Yeah. I mean it could be- it could be from anybody. But I think, you know, I’m- I for one, can’t wait to see what happens. I’m riveted. And I know that we all have our own predictions over who caused the bus crash. THEO: Which we won’t go into right now. SANDY: No. We’re gonna save those, and we’re gonna take a break. And we’ll come back after a little while. I think we’re gonna hit the music segment. We’re gonna let a little Theo Investigates happen. We’ll come back at the end with our own predictions. Sound good? THEO: Sounds excellent. PC: I- yeah. It sounds good. SANDY: All right. We’ll be back after this. [Now. The Greatest Person You Will Never Meet. Behold her awesome power.] CAMVO: Hey Mars’ fans, this is Cameron, your transcriber, with my bus crash suspects. So I guess I’ll uh, get right to it. My suspect is Creepy Cassidy Casablancas. That’s right. I went there. I believe that Beaver crashed the bus. So, Scarlett I hope you’ll protect me from Bailey. I think that Rob has been throwing clues at us all season, and I’ve got a list that seems to add up to Evil Beaver. So I think that the Beav was molested um, like Marcos and Peter, by Woody Goodman. I think those two wanted to come forward, you know the “outing of all outings” in Neptune, but Beaver refused to be a part of it because he didn’t want anyone to know what had happened to him. In my mind, um, this all fits with his reaction in last year’s A Trip to the Dentist when he threw up after being left alone with Veronica in a potentially sexual situation, you know, where she’s vulnerable and there’s nothing she can do to stop him. I think that, you know, triggered some memories. And his unease about having a sexual relationship with Mac seems to go along with this as well. CAMVO: Um, so Beaver decided to stop Marcos and Peter. Um, I think he had the bomb made though I don’t have explanations for who helped him with that or if they knew what he was planning. I think he planted the rat on the bus because he knew- he knows his brother. He knows that Dick’s going to complain and get the 09ers off the bus, one way or another. Um. With the crash he was able to get rid of Peter and Marcos plus Cervando, the kid who threatened him. I think some of the kids were casualties of Beaver’s plan as opposed to targets. CAMVO: I also think Beaver was the one who sent the email to Woody Goodman with the voices on the tape. You know, with his voice, the third voice, edited out. When Mr. Pope told that Palo Alto story about the consequences of incorporation Beaver looked worried about the money he would lose. So I think he sent the email to Woody, and that’s why Woody set himself up at the Camelot with, you know, the woman, um… in um… Look Who’s Stalking. So. Um. Woody had to stop incorporation or face exposure by the Beav. And I also think that Mac’s cell phone receptor will come into play again. I think she’s going to hear something incriminating um, from Beaver. CAMVO: Finally, I think Beaver is just due for a fall because he was redeemed again right before the finale. Rob loves to make us fall in love with characters and then yank the rug out from under us, so. I know there are a lot of holes in this theory. Um, especially since we still don’t know who was the actual target of the bomb. Yeah, thanks Rob. And my biggest problem with this is whether or not I think Beaver is really capable of murder. We’ve seen him threaten Dick and be generally misogynistic, you know, with Mac, Kendall, whatever. But is he a killer? And that’s the question. So I, for one, cannot wait until Tuesday. [See. Greatest Ever. Mind Blowing. Phenomenal. 10/10. Glorious.] PC: Aargh! This is the dread pirate Polter-Cow, and it’s time to discuss the latest sea shanty from Veronica Mars. [Laugher] THEO: That was maybe the best intro I’ve ever heard. SANDY: I think it’s the best. The. Best. THEO: I know. SANDY: I don’t know what any of it means though. BAILEY: We’d like to welcome Bailey to the show once more to talk about the music from this week’s episode. [Hellos all around.] SANDY: That’s a hard act to follow, Bailey. THEO: Absolutely. [Silence…] SANDY: So do you… do you want to tell us about the music from this week? [Laughter. Apparently Bailey is taking the night off.] SANDY: Anytime, Bailey! BAILEY: I’m… what am I supposed to say? [Laugher] SANDY: The music! THEO: You see, we thought at this time we’d do a segment where you could talk about the music in the episode. [Laughter] BAILEY: Hey! Was someone supposed to- Hey! I’m used to being led in! I don’t know whether to start or- THEO: [fake sigh] Sorry! BAILEY: -is someone gonna ask me or am I just gonna start talking? SANDY: You’re just gonna start talking. THEO: How are you? SANDY: Tell us about the music. Tell us about the music in this week. BAILEY: I’m sorry. Something’s wrong. See. What I mean. This is- I always screw it up. SANDY: Seriously? THEO: Okay. SANDY: We’re still recording and I’m not cutting any of this, so. Anytime! THEO: Right. [NOTE FROM THE TRANSCRIBER: I would not be averse to any future decisions to CUT STUFF OUT!] BAILEY: Oh my God! This week on the episode was Adrienne Pierce with Lost and Found! [Laughter] THEO: Loved it. BAILEY: It was a great song. THEO: I thought it was so well placed too. BAILEY: It was. It oh- PC: It’s on the soundtrack. BAILEY: It is- [laughter] SANDY: Bailey’s fired. PC is taking over Bailey’s gig. No! We’re not stopping! We’re gonna keep going. THEO: Absolutely. SANDY: It’s on the soundtrack… BAILEY: It’s used in the scene where Wallace is saying goodbye to Veronica and that getting stuck to the flagpole was worth it and all that mushy stuff. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: I loved the mushy stuff. BAILEY: It is. It’s good. And the lyrics are so great. “One of us is leaving soon, but we’re both already gone.” How perfect was that? That was perfect. SANDY: It was perfect. I know a lot of people had talked about different scenes that it could possibly- PC: Yeah. THEO: Mhmm. PC: We’re going through guessing it could be a Logan/Veronica song, a Veronica/Duncan song, a Keith/Veronica song, a Veronica/Backup song, a Mac and Beaver or Mac and Butters song. I don’t know. But no one guessed Veronica and Wallace. BAILEY: No. And it’s so perfect for that too. It would be the last thing that you’d guess beforehand, but after seeing it you don’t think it could be used in a better way. SANDY: I will say- PC: Right, that answers that lyrically, “You’re the best thing that happened to me.” Which I don’t think they actually used in this show, but it’s in there. SANDY: You know, I think um, my only disappointment with that was it was very much like the final episode of Buffy, where it would’ve been really poignant when she says goodbye to Spike and he dies – Spoiler! – um, if you haven’t seen Buffy, which is just a travesty you should go watch it. THEO: I hate you. SANDY: Um, but if you- BAILEY: Yeah. Sandy. Geez. SANDY: I know I suck. Um. But you know it would have been really sad and poignant to watch Spike give up his own life if we hadn’t already heard the news he was gonna be on Angel next season. THEO: Mhmm. SANDY: It kinda took away from that sadness. THEO: Did it? SANDY: Yes. THEO: I wouldn’t know. SANDY: Well I mean it was still sad. I still cried. But it was less sad. And I think the Veronica/Wallace scene, while sad and weepy and it chokes me up; still not quite as sad as it would have been if we really had any real, genuine doubt that she would go to Hearst. Although if we don’t get a season three than it’s gonna be really tragic. And I’m gonna go watch. And I’m gonna be really sad. THEO: We’re getting a season three because I will not hear of any other way. Because this show is the best show. SANDY: You better start knocking on wood. Theo. THEO: Knock on wood. Absolutely. BAILEY: Yeah. Theo, knock. THEO: Yeah. I wasn’t the one that mentioned the fact that we weren’t- we might not get another season. The greatness of the show and the greatness of the fans. So. PC: By the way, I’m gonna knock on wood. Hope this is wood. [Knocking sound] SANDY: Excellent. BAILEY: I just tried to do it and I hit my knuckles too hard and I’m like, wincing in pain. THEO: Very good. BAILEY: But yes. Um. Lost and Found. You can listen to it at her MySpace and you can listen to a bunch of other songs. She’s really great. And her MySpace is www.myspace.com/adriennepierce. PC: And if you like that song, Bailey, I would recommend Em Griner. She’s a Canadian artist. Kind of the same sort of pop vein. When I was listening to the song on the soundtrack it really reminded me of Em Griner’s stuff. BAILEY: Right. PC: It was the same sort of- very good- lots of really good lyrics, really good music. And I think anybody who’s a fan of that song should check her out. BAILEY: Okay. We’ll put a link up on the website as well for that. PC: All right. SANDY: Excellent. Now I think you had a little contest. You had a little contest going on though, right? BAILEY: Yes! I have a winner. I have a winner to my Six Degrees of Separation contest and that winner is Monica. Congratulations, Monica. SANDY: Excellent. BAILEY: And it’s totally deserved because she sent in like, a million different connections that I never even thought of. They just kept coming, coming. Even after she won she kept sending them, so. It’s definitely deserved. And um, here is one of Monica’s winning connections. BAILEY: Mere Mortals song Lost Art was in The Quick and the Wed as was I Want You to Want Me, which was sung by Jane’s Sister. I Want You to Want Me was covered by Lindsay Lohan, whose song I Decide was on the Princess Diaries 2 soundtrack. Also on the Princess Diaries 2 soundtrack was Rachel Stevens’ song, Fools. And Rachel Stevens’ song Glide was written by Cathy Dennis who also wrote many songs for Kylie Minogue including: Can’t Get You Out of My Head. SANDY: Excellent. Very well done. THEO: Wow. SANDY: And you know, I have to say you said Monica won this contest, and Monica has also submitted to us, per Scarlett’s request, along with another listener, and we are gonna put both of these up on our website, coded invitations for the Alterna-prom. And they’re both awesome. So. We’re gonna put those up. THEO: They’re incredible. BAILEY: Isn’t Monica just amazing? SANDY: Monica is amazing. PC: Wait, wait, wait. You wanna know how amazing Monica is? BAILEY: Yes. I do. PC: She’s actually the reason we have those Logan/Wallace scenes in that egg drop episode. SANDY: Really? BAILEY: That’s what she told me. I was- ‘cause I told her she won a chance to ask Mere Mortals a question when they came on for an interview, and she said, “Well, last time I interviewed or asked someone else a question….” And I was like, “Wow! You’re awesome!” SANDY: We love you Monica. BAILEY: We do. Congratulations Monica, for being so cool. SANDY: All right. Well I think that’s all we have for music this week. BAILEY: I think it is. Um, right now we’ve actually got Lost and Found for you to listen to, so if someone wants to take us out? [Aarghs] BAILEY: Or do you want me to not s- SANDY: Aargh. We’re gonna take us out right now and take that musical break and be back after this! [MUSICAL BREAK- Adrienne Pierce- Lost and Found.] [Cameron wonders: what is the meaning of this “musical break” she is hearing? She recalls a time when these were plentiful, like buffalo on the open plains. Alas, it must be a hallucination brought on by exhaustion.] NONAVO: Hey Mars’ fans, it’s Nona, your lovely show notes writer with my uh, whodunit theory for the bus crash. I’m gonna say it was Corny. Now I’m sure you’re asking yourself, why is she accusing the friendly local stoner? But there’s just one, simple, entirely dumb reason for this, and it’s because Corny’s been in three episodes this season thus far. He’s been in Blast from the Past, Versatile Toppings, and Look Who’s Stalking. That’s three episodes, which is the exact same number of episodes that Aaron was in last season before he was revealed as Lilly’s killer. So that’s my entirely nonsensical theory and I’m sticking to it. Enjoy the finale, guys. THEO: Welcome back to the show, Veronica Mars’ fans. This week Theo Investigates takes a little bit of a lighter note. Uh, I think, you know, this week we all need to just take a few minutes and enjoy the suspense. After Tuesday, we’ll all know the big secrets. We’ll all be in on the mystery. And most likely kicking ourselves and saying how could we have missed that over and over and over, exactly like I did in the first season. But for now I say we all just sit back, chat with friends and fellow fans. Keep trying to get people to watch the DVDs and uh, watching the show. And enjoy these last few days of uncertainty. THEO: In that vein I have to say I got a lot of great emails this week from people that were very smart, very intelligent, and had some of the best ideas as to the Top Five suspects I have ever heard. And I’m not gonna tell you what my top suspect is right now because later in the show everyone involved in the podcast, whether it’s on the air or behind the scenes, everyone’s going to bring you their uh, personal picks for the top suspect. And I’m gonna wait until then to reveal mine. But I have to say, I originally thought it was one character and now after reading some of the great emails that you’ve all sent this week; you changed my mind. You actually convinced me it was someone completely different. So kudos to you. You’ll hear my pick later. But right now, I’m doing the Top Three Theo Fantasy Picks that have absolutely nothing to do with Veronica Mars. These are three people who are not involved in the Veronica Mars world but have uh, let’s just say bad motives. THEO: Number Three: Chad Michael Murray from One Tree Hill. [CAMERON: HA!] THEO: That’s right. I think he did the bus crash. You know why? ‘Cause their show won the Save One Show poll. And I hold a grudge like nobody’s business. Actually I- all the One Tree Hill fans out there, I’ve actually never seen the show. But I had to give you guys a good ribbing for winning the poll. Congratulations and I hope both shows make it to next season. Obviously, my loyalty lies with Veronica Mars, but good luck. THEO: Uh, Number Two: Another interloper in the Tuesday night lineup. Pepper Dennis. That’s right. Rebecca Romijn. I think she bombed the bus hoping to get rid of Veronica Mars to pave the way for her own debut on network television. Uh, spunky journalist? Hasn’t that been done like, 800 times? I don’t know. Whatever. I haven’t seen the show because I’ve been, obviously, watching Veronica Mars when I can. THEO: Number One: The source of all evil in the world, I think. Lord Voldemort. That’s right. The Dark Lord has returned and has vengeance for Neptune high school students for some odd reason. Perhaps the bus actually just ran into the night bus. I’m not sure. I think all you Harry Potter fans out there will back me up in saying that Voldemort never really needs a reason to do anything evil. So uh. I’m pinning this one on the Dark Lord. And I’m sure most of you will agree with me. Good luck hunting him down, Veronica Mars, but I think if a muggle has to do it, I’d want our girl Veronica to. So anyway. Uh, thanks for listening everyone. Please stay tuned and right after this break we will uh, come back with our personal picks that everyone- I know at least all of us here have been waiting to hear. So thanks a lot, and we’ll be right back. DRUNKSCVO: Hi there. This is Scarlett. It’s totally Mr. Manning for the bus crash. Mr. Manning for the bus crash. He’s way creepier than Mayor McCreepy. He’s a pedophile. He’s- God he’s got Gia for a daughter. There is nothing that’s not creepy about him. It’s gotta be him. You’ve gotta be with me guys. Come on, unmotivated choice big season no reason! Mr. Manning. We’re there. Aren’t we? We are. We’re good. Go Pirates! MYSTERYVO: You killed your wife. In front of ten witnesses. And the bloody gloves fit? Hire Sleazy and Weasel, attorneys at law. For a small fee we’ll get you a not guilty faster than you can say reasonable doubt. For freedom. Sleazy and Weasel. You’ve got no conscience. We’ve got no shame. THEO: Aargh! Welcome back, Veronica Mars’ fans. And now we are going to talk- PC: My intro was better. THEO: It was! But you interrupted mine! So maybe I was going somewhere. But we’ll never know, will we? [Laughter] PC: No. THEO: ‘Cause now- I’m sorry. All right. Fine. Now. Predictions. BAILEY: Why don’t we just all do it? Aargh. [Aarghs] PC: Yo yo yo. Wait a minute. I think we should do a collective aargh. Let’s do a collective aargh. It’ll be fun. [Aarghs. They mess it up.] PC: 1-2-3. [CAMERON: Aargh!] SANDY: I kept my aargh quiet. THEO: That was nice. SANDY: I prefer the understated aargh. THEO: That was nice. SANDY: Polter-Cow, bringing the random. Um. Okay. So this is the- THEO: Speaking of completely random uh, now we are going to talk about our predictions for the uh- BAILEY: Aargh! THEO: -see. I was trying to add that in. Thank you for noticing. Um. Our predictions for the guilty party in the bus crash. SANDY: Yes. The final podcast predicts segment. So who wants to start? Theo. THEO: I think- I think our guest- BAILEY: I think our guest. THEO: -Polter-Cow should start. BAILEY: Yeah. PC: Oh. SANDY: Well I was gonna let him have the prime spot of going last, but if you guys wanna get him out of the way. Be rude. [Laughter] PC: Well. My suspect for the uh, bus crash, the big season long mystery, is none other then Jacques Preppernau. SANDY: Ooh. Intriguing. PC: The son of Coach Preppernau who happens to break up a lot of fights. Now. Remember that the message that Woody was sent had French dialogue in the background. Initially I connected that to the French teacher in Like A Virgin. But no! The French connection is actually through Jacques Preppernau! [Laughter] BAILEY: Ooh. THEO: Ooh. SANDY: Very clever. THEO: I love the French connection. SANDY: Very clever. BAILEY: You know I do too. PC: Yes. SANDY: Well. And now you can love it even more. PC: The motives for Jacque’s bus crash crashing tendencies are really a mystery, as is Jacques Preppernau, so I really can’t speculate very much. But if it’s not Jacques Preppernau, my backup guess is not Backup, the dog, but Cervando. Who also killed Felix, by the way. THEO: Ah. SANDY: Very intriguing. BAILEY: You know I think you’re on to something. SANDY: Very intriguing. And since you’re a special guest we’ll let you slide with that alternate prediction. THEO: Yeah. SANDY: But don’t you other kids try it. One shot. THEO: Just one. SANDY: One shot. THEO: You only get one shot. That’s right. SANDY: Cracking the whip. BAILEY: Hit me with your best shot. SANDY: Yes. All right. Well my prediction- THEO: BLOW ME AWAY! [Laughter] THEO: All right? BAILEY: Hey, I’m used to this. You have to learn to expect that. THEO: I have. SANDY: Here’s my prediction. I’m gonna say, instead of a French conspiracy, it’s a vast Belgian conspiracy. And that little Ms. Shelley Pomroy- the reason you’re hearing people speak French is because this was recorded at the U.N. where they speak French. PC: Oh! [Oohs] SANDY: Yeah. And Shelley’s just a little bit too tired of the other blonde girls getting more screentime than her. She’s sick of Lilly. She offed her. She’s sick of Meg and she’s sick of Veronica. ‘Bout we got a two-for-one deal and uh, toss them over the cliff. That’s my guess. Shelley Pomroy. BAILEY: Nice. THEO: Well. All right. I’ll go. Uh. I’ll let Bailey have the honored spot going last. Um. I think it was Jackie. And I think it was Jackie because I too have the French connection because she’s obviously off to the Sorbonne. And uh, you know, she’s trying to protect her dad, trying to protect her dad’s employer, I guess. I don’t know. I just didn’t like her in the first half of the season. So I think she did it. BAILEY: Good enough reason for me! THEO: Plus. Plus nobody, NOBODY breaks my boy Wallace’s heart and gets away with it. So I think she deserves to go to jail for a little while for that. So anyway. BAILEY: Aw. PC: I love- THEO: Who goes to France? PC: The Sorbonne! Oh, wow. THEO: The Sorbonne. Ooh! I went to the Sorbonne! [Laughter] PC: She doesn’t even like Sense and Sensibility! Come on! SANDY: I know. Exactly. BAILEY: Yeah! [Cameron can’t tell if PC made a faux pas there, or deliberately misnamed Pride and Prejudice. Whatevs. Cameron cares not.] PC: Or Pride and Prejudice! That was the book! [CAMERON: Heh.] [Laughter] PC: Jane Austen! SANDY: She’s trashing my girl Jane Austen. THEO: Where’s Mr. Darcy when you need him? BAILEY: Yes. Ooh. Mr. Darcy… SANDY: All right. Bailey? PC: Mr. Darcy crashed the bus. [Laughter] SANDY: Where’s Colin Firth? THEO: Jane Austen crashed the bus. SANDY: Colin Firth crashed the bus. BAILEY: Hey. Sylvia Plath, anybody? THEO: I’ll take you up on that. PC: Virginia Woolf. [Laughter] PC: It was a watery death! [Cameron has lost all sense of patience.] SANDY: All right. Bailey what’s your prediction? THEO: It was Godot. It was Godot. BAILEY: Oh yes. Okay. Well. Time for me. And I- I’m gonna say Van Clemmons. For a couple of reasons. And the first reason is insurance for the- for the- PC: The bus. BAILEY: Long day. Um. This was an easier way of firing Ms. Dumass, easier than firing Ms. Dumass. THEO: I guess so. BAILEY: And then, the biggest reason is he can get rid of Veronica Mars. THEO: Ooh. BAILEY: Won’t have to deal with her anymore. SANDY: No more of those pesky meddling kids. THEO: She’s too clever for that. BAILEY: Yes. SANDY: All right. Well I think we’re gonna jump and we’ll be back uh, to take you out with our final words of wisdom. PC: Rock on. NOTDRUNKSCVO: In the world of noir Lilly’s experiencing The Big Sleep. Veronica is frequently On The Nut. Logan was looking at time in The Big House. And who can count the number of times someone on this show has been Behind the Eight Ball. If that makes no sense to you, than don’t worry. You just haven’t watched enough noir films. It’s a well-known fact among fans that Veronica Mars draws inspiration from the genre film-noir, and this genre almost has a language of its own. Here I’ll leave you with just a few examples, but check out misscatonic.org/slang.htm for a full glossary. It’s pretty awesome. The Big Sleep: death. To be On the Nut: to be broke. The Big House: jail or prison. To be Behind the Eight Ball: to be stuck in a tight spot or tricky situation. To Burn Powder: to fire a gun. A Chicago Overcoat: a coffin. Duck Soup: in Veronica’s words: simple, facile, cake. SANDY: Well that’s it Pirates. That completes yet another podcast. THEO: Yup. And I hope everyone out there has a good time watching the finale whether you’re with friends or alone. Uh, enjoy it. I know I will. SANDY: I definitely will as well. And we certainly wanna give a special thank you to our guest host for this week filling in for Scarlett, Polter-Cow. Thank you so much for coming by. PC: Thank you. THEO: Absolutely. PC: It was an honor. I had a great time. SANDY: Well we had a great time having you here. THEO: We sure did. PC: All right. Well. This is Polter-Cow filling in for Scarlett with this week’s inspirational message: “Everyone was in awe of the lion tamer in a cage with half a dozen lions. Everyone but a school bus driver.” SANDY: See you soon, Pirates. We’ll catch you next week. [CLOSING THEME! Brent Pocker- Neptune’s Water] BAILEY: If you’re interested in the music featured in this week’s podcast, find out more at www.neptunepirateradio.com or email me at bailey@neptunepirateradio.com. Additionally, some of the music you heard here tonight was provided by the Podshow Podsafe music network. Check it out at: http://music.podshow.com. Happy Finale Week! [Cameron, the transcriber, was not kidding about the dead last week. She was so dead it took her four extra days to finish this 41-page transcript. That’s dead, people.] [END TRANSCRIPT] [END BROADCAST] |